April 2nd, 2014
I had wanted this baby to come early, since I am in the Millennial choir and the concert was scheduled for nine days after my due date. There were to be four concerts at over two hours each, over two days’time, plus a 4 hour dress rehearsal. Two of my three previous babies had been born early so I thought for sure this one would be as well. I needed as much recovery time as possible for my big weekend coming up. I was checked at 38 weeks and found to be at a 2 and 50% effaced. The next week I was at a 4 and 70% effaced. I had occasional strong contractions but nothing as strong as real labor contractions.
(Me at 37 weeks)
On March 31st I got desperate enough to drink castor oil. My sister, who successfully used it to bring on labor with both her kids, gave me some advice. “Drink it with soda,” she said, “otherwise it’s soooo nasty.” I had a few cans of lemon-lime soda back in the pantry, so I mixed in 2 Tb of oil and drank it, chased by a glass of orange juice. I plugged my nose and did not taste it at all, yay! Then I waited. I drank it at 6pm, and that evening contractions started. I was confused because I hadn’t had any diarrhea yet. My sister texted at midnight, “how’s the diarrhea?”I texted back that I hadn’t had any yet and right after that, I had to get to the toilet quickly! Nice timing. My labor got stronger and stronger, and I had to go to the bathroom a few more times, and finally around 4 the contractions were strong and 3-5 minutes apart. We called my mom and went to the hospital.
After being checked I was found to be at a 4 still. No fun! I was disappointed and embarrassed. This is my fourth baby, you’d think I’d know when labor was strong enough to go to the hospital. I labored for an hour and still no progress, so we went home. Mark stayed home from work that day so I could rest, and I slept all morning. Labor was still happening, but the contractions were getting further and further apart. I had a midwife appointment scheduled for that morning but I texted my midwife and she said to not worry about coming in. I scheduled a reflexology appointment and had that done around 1pm. It was way more than I expected. I thought it would be like a special foot rub, but it was a full body massage with special attention paid to the pressure points that bring on labor. So relaxing and just what I needed in the middle of labor and at the end of my pregnancy.
My contractions didn’t really increase in frequency after that but I felt so relaxed that I didn’t care. We decided to go walk around the mall for a while to see if that would speed things up. We got there around 3:30 and started walking. Every ten or fifteen minutes I had to stop to breathe through a contraction and the kids would wait and watch me curiously. They played at the play area for a little while and I walked in brisk circles around them. I was getting tired so we went to Chipotle for dinner, then Frost for some gelato for dessert. We told the kids it was a special night because it was most likely the last night we would spend together as a family of five. They loved the gelato (so did I) but I had some big contractions while we were there. We went home after that and since I was contracting pretty hard and regularly, Mark put the kids to bed while I sat on the labor ball and watched TV.
After the kids were asleep, Mark came down and we watched some of a movie while I labored. It was nice to have that distraction. After a while, the contractions slowed down in frequency, but not intensity. I thought maybe I should try to get some rest, so we went to bed around eleven. I slept until 2:15am, when I woke up to a BIG contraction. I started to remember what transition felt like. A few more big contractions later I woke up Mark and told him I was ready to go. I hate contracting while riding in the car so I wanted to get there before I was too far into transition. Mark texted Ramona that we were headed in.
I got checked and was found to be at a six. Yay! They moved me to a delivery room and had me stay on the monitors for a while because the baby wasn’t reacting to contractions the way they wanted. There was something that needed to happen with her heart rate after a contraction (maybe it was during?) but it wasn’t so they kept me hooked up until they felt good about it. She was declared fine after an hour or so and I was released from those monitors. My contractions were very powerful and I had to go into my deep relaxed state to get through them. They were still pretty far apart, like ten minutes or so. Ramona arrived and broke my water to keep things moving. After that I walked around and around the room, pausing for contractions at the foot of the bed. I would lean over it, resting on my arms, and Mark would rub my lower back.
After another hour or so, I asked to be checked again. Ramona said I was at an 8-9 with a stretchy cervix. “You can push if you feel the urge,” she told me. I was excited but also really dreading the pushing. It’s the part that I feel like my body is being ripped in half. Give me hard contractions any day over the “ring of fire.” I would gladly skip that part if I could. I got back on the bed in a semi reclined position and waited for some more contractions. Ramona could feel a small lip of cervix in front of the baby’s head, and that was the only thing keeping the baby inside. She had me push through three or four contractions to try and get her past that lip, but alas, she was still stuck. I also was not feeling “pushing” contractions. I knew the difference.
Ramona recommended a position change. “Can you stand up?” she asked. Um, no way. I knew once the baby started to move down, it would be a fast descent and I didn’t want to be standing for that. “How about you kneel against the back of the bed?” was her next suggestion. I could do that. With help from Mark and the nurse, I turned around and rested my elbows at the top of the bed.
Ramona had me sway my hips from side to side and front to back to help the baby maneuver down. The next contraction was so huge and painful and after groaning through it I cried a little. I knew what was coming. I kept taking deep breaths and grasping at what mental power I had left. At this point it was around 8:30am. Mark, Ramona, and the nurse kept telling me what an awesome job I was doing. I still doubted myself. I started to feel like I’d rather die than push the baby out. But I also knew that my baby was very close and soon I would be holding her and smelling her sweet, amniotic fluid smell. I knew there was only one way to go and that was to push her out. I HAD to do it. The next contraction came and I cried out, “oohhhhhh, she’s coming!” and “I need to turn around!” They helped me turn around after that contraction, but before I got all the way around, the next one hit. I flopped down where I was and couldn’t move any more. I was on my back, semi reclined, and a bit diagonal. My left side was right against the rail of the bed and my body was following the same angle. Nobody seemed to mind, but they kept asking me to hold my legs up with my hands. I simply couldn’t do it. There was no possible way I could grab my legs at that point. A second later after I shouted, “I CAN’T!” I felt two people grab my legs and bring them up towards my head.
I screamed a couple of times and Ramona said she was nearly out. She said, “One more big push!” and I PUSHED that child out right through that ring of fire. I realized something….I had forgotten what that ring of fire felt like. Sure, I remembered that it was painful and that I hated it, but the exact feeling had faded from my memory. All I have to say is THANK GOODNESS for that! Or I would only have one kid.
Ramona said, “Reach down and take your baby!” I opened my eyes and there she was, all purpley and grayish and wet and scrunched. I reached down with shaking hands and brought her to my chest. I hadn’t even had time to unbutton for the skin to skin, but people helped me with that and soon she was snuggling with me as I whimpered and smelled and kissed her. Someone was rubbing her with a towel and someone else took her temperature and I was still waiting for her to cry. I asked,” why hasn’t she cried yet?” Someone told me, “She’s breathing fine, she just isn’t crying!” She looked at us with wide eyes and made cute little faces with her lips. It was truly magical.
Soon I pushed out the placenta and Mark cut the cord. He’s a pro at that by now. The true relief from the pain doesn’t really come until after the placenta comes out. At that point it is a heavenly euphoric happy feeling that is such a stark contrast to what you were feeling just a few minutes earlier. She was born at 8:34am with about ONE minute of pushing.
I had Mark take a video and wished later that we had done that with all the babies. It’s so special to watch again. I nursed her and she latched right on as if she was already a seasoned nursling. She nursed for 15-20 minutes on each side and was wide awake for quite a while. Mark held her and we both admired her and smelled her. Have I mentioned that I love the smell of newborn babies straight from the womb?
Next she was weighed and measured. She was 8lbs 10oz, the biggest of my babies, and 21in long. Since I had a history of post-partum hemorrhaging, I was given pitocin via IV upon delivery to help my uterus contract quickly down to minimize bleeding. Ramona gave me the good news that I hadn’t torn and that I was hardly bleeding. I was cautiously optimistic since my last hemorrhage had occurred after moving to the post partum room. But true enough, my bleeding has been very minimal and I have had a speedy recovery thanks to the intact perineum.
And as for my concerts? I wore Cambry in the sling to the dress rehearsal and stood in my place on the risers as she slept. After the loud brass and percussion instruments woke her up, I went backstage and nursed her as I continued to sing along and watch the rehearsal on a screen. Mark’s mom, my dad, my sister, and a friend all helped hold Cambry during the concerts in the green room. I nursed her before and after each concert, and during one long piano concerto ¾ of the way through the concert. She did well and I felt amazing. I was able to stand just fine for all of those hours of singing and I didn’t miss a single song. I know I was being blessed, because the next two or three days I was EXHAUSTED. I barely made it through that Sunday, and it took me a good few days to recover from the concerts. Singing in this choir has blessed my life so much, I do not regret signing up for this semester knowing I would have a brand new baby for it.
Now the question everyone asks: Are we done having kids? If you are asking me now, I say “YES!” with the ring of fire so fresh in my memory, as well as a difficult pregnancy. If you ask me in two years, I might change my mind. It will depend on what God has planned for our family.
I do need to mention that I drank four cups of red raspberry leaf tea (it was actually a blend of RRL, nettle leaf, oatstraw, rose petals, and alfalfa) daily for the last five weeks of pregnancy. I also took the herb called 5W which is a blend of herbs to help the uterus prepare for labor. I drank and swallowed all that in hopes that my labor would be speedy, but it was not. However, I truly believe that the tea and herbs (and probably my plant-based diet) helped me have an amazing recovery with minimal bleeding. If I do have another baby, I will drink that tea every day throughout (you drink just one cup to start, and increase as you progress towards 40 weeks).
Newborn photos. I just love her so much!
